Mother Fucker...Scum Bag!

Dear [ebay Seller]

you ripped me off mother fucker...scum bag

-[removed]

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LOL What can I say? He's a man of few (and very strong) words.

Happy Friday y'all.

Why the Heck Does it Take So Long?

Hi there,
            My name is [removed] and I am replying to the email that was sent to me on Thursday, 2-10-2011, stating that a refund had been issued to my account, it's been 5 days and there is still no refund in my account. I paid to ship it back to you, so I expect a FULL refund of the money that you took out of my account,The balance taken from my account was 69.84, and I am waiting on the money to come so I CAN get my new phone, which you have so kindly kept me from getting. The money was taken out of my account within ten minutes of my order being placed, so i ask you, why the hell does it take so long to put it back? This matter should have been resolved already and it has taken long enough. You sold me a junk phone, own up to your mistake and give me my money back, why does this have to be so difficult? Its a no brainer, not a think thru decision, I really hope you can get this back to me soon because I need it, I don't have thousands laying in my bank account, every cent matters and your holding me up. I am not trying to be rude but this is kind of rediculous.

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Dear sir:

Our return policy clearly states you pay for the return shipping, and that we do not refund shipping fees. Not only is it on the website, but also on the Return Form you filled out to send the item back. That aside, the phone you sent back wasn't even defective! I do admit we sell shitty phones sometimes, but--no. This time it was all you; I personally played with your phone and the reason stated for return? FALSE.

So, you have a problem about the time frame of your refund showing up in your bank account? I could give two shits. I don't work for them and couldn't tell you when it will be there. I do suggest you call them up and hash it out with them.

You know what? "Your" right, this *is* "rediculous". I'm so over this.

Have a good weekend!

Deena

Don't Like it? Don't Buy!

Subject: price

Ineed a used or refurbished motorola razr z3xx. But your prices are twice as high as ebay. Would rather buy from at&t because of the reliability.  DEPEND ON MY CELL PHONE A LOT. Am disabled and would not dare leave home without my cell.Fixed income will not allow me to buy a Motorola razr z3xx from you. please adjust your prices.


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If you can get the item cheaper on eBay, by all means, do so. Why bother to email and complain about our prices? We don't price match. Odds are if you *do* buy it on eBay, you might be buying it from us anyway.

Back in the day I had a customer like this. Called and made a big stink about our prices, then emailed us to gloat about getting it cheaper on ebay... guess who he bought it from?



LOL

Here We Go Again...

Subject: samsung

I just recived a cell phone from you.It was sapposed to be brand new. It looks new yet it did not have a oweners manual in the box.I tried to call you about my delema.But it seems that your business is so good that you do not have towork a full day on fridays. God bless you. I am upset that you may not read this untill Monday morning.Ihave no Idea how to work this phone am I sapossed to guess at it. I will probly return it on Monday.

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It seems English/spelling FAIL still continues.

I emailed the customer, but they probably returned the item already. Unauthorized returns are a pain in the ass, mainly because a high percentage of them put no identifying information in the box, so I have to Nancy Drew everything :/

Warning! Learning Curve: Slippery When Dumb

To Whom It May Concern,

I placed an order for one Motorola Backflip on January 27th. I received the device on February 4th and after a few days have decided this is not the product I originally believed it to be. While the handset is one of high quality, it exceeds my expectations and causes more grief and confusion than anything else. I simply cannot grasp the learning curve associated with this device and wish to return it. There is nothing wrong with the device and considering the time span of which I've possessed it, I see no reason why it can't be returned. Thus I'm emailing you folks so that I can receive a Return Authorization (RA) Form and send this device back to you.

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I was ROFL when I read this one. What I wonder is this: what did she "originally believe it to be"? An iPhone? A RAZR? What?

I bought a vibrator, and it wasn't what i originally believed it to be, but I made the most of it *rimshot*

This phone isn't ridiculously hard to use... it's pretty intuitive actually. Hell, my mom has a G1, and she learned to use it within a week or two. People are lazy and don't *want* to learn.

She can return it for a refund -20% *shrugs*

English FAIL Week Draws to a Close...

Subject: Order shipped 

Woops...sorry I returned it today by PM without getting RMA# because I did not want to hold anylonger. It's so important for me that as soon as I found the item was not what I wanted, I supposed to returne.

I had just wanted to replace my phone since mine is broken, and can't cancle due to 2yr contract. However, the one I ordered thr your website, I missed it wasn't available to T-mobile. So, the sam card did not fit into the one I got.

Please I already requested for exchange with something else, and the one I shipped today. Please understand and help me with it.

Thanks
SOON <=== is this a name or....??? I haven't a clue so I left it :/

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This has been declared English FAIL Week, as a good amount of the emails chosen were... well, poster boards for ESL school enrollment. Everyday (almost without fail!) I get some non English speaking person (or two or...) to call and harass me. The ones that get me the most are the Spanish speaking ones, and the Indian sounding ones.

• The Spanish ones ALWAYS ask "you aspeekay espanol?" When told no, they get an attitude and demand to speak to someone who speaks Spanish, When told there is no one, they hang up in a huff.
• The Indian ones are always rude.... especially if you tell them you cannot understand them, or to repeat something they said. I had a guy start yelling at me when I (nicely) asked him to repeat what he was looking for. I gathered he yelled something about his English being "good like you" XD

Learn some fucking English. All of you.

Now, before I get angry comments and emails screaming nationalism/racism/other -isms, I want y'all to know something: I am a first generation American. I'm the daughter of two immigrants whose first language was *gasp* SPANISH. Goddamn it, if my parents can come here and learn proper English, raise three kids to speak only English...why can't these disparaged mofos?

How fair is it for you (general you) to come here and demand to be catered to in your native language?? You think I could go to YOUR country and demand everyone speak to me and help me in English? Of course not! So why do people come here expecting that courtesy? If you make a conscious decision to live somewhere, learn the language or GTFO. //rant

OK, Seriously.... WTF??

Subject: leeter  

hey bay 2 phones this no work bay in decenber

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.....

I'll make a hat for the person who deciphers this for me.

In the meanwhile, I emailed them to ask for clarification. I'll keep you posted.

Too Bad, So Sad...

Subject: No Subject

Just wanted to express that i will never order from you guys again or recommend you to anyone else.  I have ordered merchandise online from many companies as i do a lot of ordering online.  I think the 20% restocking fee is a rip off. In addition you also charged for the shipping.  As a parent with children i know i will need to order other phones i already have a company that wants to keep their customers happy by having policies that are more reasonable.

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This customer bought a Sidekick and wanted to use it with AT&T. The listing clearly stated that the item was locked to T-Mobile, but they decided they could get it unlocked for their provider.

Umm, NOT.

So they returned the item for a refund. We CLEARLY state that all non defective returns are subjected to a 20% restocking fee and we do not refund shipping. This is mentioned on the website, as well as the return authorization form they are required to fill out and send back with the item. If you didn't read it, too bad for you. I try to be reasonable and fair, but...really? It's not like this came out of nowhere--- you were warned about this.

Let this be a lesson to you all: buyer beware. Read the fine print, read the return policy BEFORE committing to a purchase... not just online, but in brick-and-mortar stores too.

...There isn't a Title Good Enough for this One....

Subject:  PENDING ORDER  

PLEASE CANCEL MY ORDER NOW.  I CALLED MY CREDIT CARD CUSTOMER SERVICE AND I HAVE $900 DOLLARS AVAILABLE.  I AM NEARLY BLIND FROM A RECENT BRAIN SURGERY AND THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH STRESS FOR ME. SORRY I PLACED THE ORDER  WITH YOU...    

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Backstory:

This customer attempted to place an order, but the order was declined. There are ususally two reasons cards are declined by our card processor: an address error, or you'se a broke bitch.

She fit into the latter category.

It gives a "general decline" message and tells you to tell the customer to contact their credit card/bank. I replied (in a polite manner of course) explaining she needed to contact her bank and that's what I got. *shrugs*

Umm, Wut? UPDATE

So after deciphering what the customer was trying to say, it seems like they returned an item to us without return authorization. I sent them an email stating we don't accept unauthorized returns.

Here is their response:

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Subject:     Return

I'm worried because they send before the cell phone and not send the completed form along
with the package is a copy of my receipt and the reason why l return.

Please pay me and if you send me the package back again. Why not send the completed form l
have to pay again to return it again sorry for this little problem when they take the package in the mail.
Had not yet received your message along with the way l had to send and there is another problem the
address to send it was to this l'm going to white:

[Address removed]

And the EMail l received from you is: [removed]

(Please can give me solucion)

And l'm Sorry for incovenience and thank them for answering my EMail.

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Yeah.  What they said... whatever that may be. *HEAD DESK*